Whew….been a while.

I listened to her reading the words of another and the jealousy swelled inside, painfully exposing a longing imprisoned deep inside me with its sudden expansion.  I have held it, tightly bound against the light, out of view; out of print – for her – for so long.

But with the adoration in her voice for those words, the complete abandon with which they rolled across her lips as she read them to me…she read them to me, one after another…then another…I pretended to be busy, I pretended not to hear them.

But I did.

She has no idea keeping quiet so long has left me in a dark place; left me crying inside, outside.  How could she know I fill my days writing silently in darkness; covered with a claustrophobic blanket of interwoven emotions and words that I haven’t allowed to expose themselves?

How could she when I smile in spite of it all?


~ by mrcsworld on September 3, 2020.

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